Who I Am Hates Who I've Been
by Marmalah
Summary: "I wanted art to be everlasting, just to believe that you would live forever." Songfic - Who I Am Hates Who I've Been by Reliant K. SasoDei.


Hey, sup? Wrote this a while ago, too… Hm… enjoy? ^^

**Disclaimer:**_ I don't own Naruto – Masashi Kishimoto does. I don't own Who I am Hates Who I've Been by Reliant K, either._

**Who I am Hates Who I've Been**

"Danna! No!" Deidara yelled into the cloudless blue sky. "Why? Why did you have to leave me, un?" He cried. Tears streamed down his cheeks.

_I watched the proverbial sunrise_

_Coming up over the Pacific and_

_You might think I'm losing my mind,_

_But I will shy away from the specifics._

Deidara sat there, with Sasori's head in his lap. He cried silently, the tears falling onto the puppets fiery red hair. "Why?" He asked hoarsely. "Why you? Why couldn't it have been that idiotic Tobi, un?" He asked the puppet, not expecting an answer.

_'Cause I don't want you to know where I am_

_'Cause then you'll see my heart_

_In the saddest state it's ever been._

_This is no place to try and live my life._

"Zetsu doesn't care, Tobi doesn't care, not even Pain cares, un. Nobody cares, un!" He yelled, anger spilling out like a glass overflowing with water. "And nobody knows the pain I'm feeling right now. My Sasori-Danna. Dead, un."

_Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it._

_See that line. Well I never should have crossed it._

_Stop right there. Well I never should have said_

_That it's the very moment that_

_I wish that I could take back._

Hours passed and Deidara still sat unmoving in the night, still as a statue. "Come, Deidara." Zetsu commanded. Deidara still sat there. "Hey! Deidara!" Zetsu called. "No, un." Was all that was heard from the blonde, stifled sobs following soon after.

_I'm sorry for the person I became._

_I'm sorry it took so long for me to change._

_I'm ready to try and never become that way again_

_'Cause who I am hates who I've been._

_Who I am hates who I've been._

Zetsu walked over silently to the blonde. "Come now." He said. He looked up into his freakish yellow eyes. Nope. There wasn't even a hint of sadness. Not even a little bit. He didn't say a word. "Come on Deidara. At least say something."

_I talk to absolutely no one._

_Couldn't keep to myself enough._

_All the things bottled up inside had finally begun_

_To create so much pressure that I'll soon blow up._

"NO! YOU DON'T EVEN CARE! YOU DON'T FUCKING CARE, UN! NO ONE IN THE AKATSUKI GIVES A SHIT! YOU CAN'T EVEN COMPARE TO HOW I'M FEELIN RIGHT NOW, UN!" Deidara screamed at the two missing nins. It echoed off the walls of the now destroyed base. "I lost my partner, because of some old fucking hag, and a pink haired freak!" Deidara had now quieted down a bit.

_I heard the reverberating footsteps_

_Sinking up to the beating of my heart,_

_And I was positive that unless I got myself together,_

_I would watch myself fall apart._

"Sasori, you lied to me. You said art was eternal. Everlasting. You _were_ art. You said you would last forever. But you were wrong,. You died. You _said_ that it was everlasting! I wanted art to be everlasting, just to believe you would live forever, dammit! You _are _art." The clay master said to the puppet master in his arms. "I thought art was fleeting, that only lasted a split second, and you thought it was eternal, everlasting. I must say one thing: I believed you." Deidara sighed. "Damn, damn, damn!" He screamed, punching the rocks. He didn't care if his knuckles bled. He didn't care about anything anymore.

_And I can't let that happen again_

_'Cause then you'll see my heart_

_In the saddest state it's ever been._

_This is no place to try and live my life._

_Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it._

_See that line. Well I never should have crossed it._

_Stop right there. Well I never should have said_

_That it's the very moment that_

_I wish I could take back._

_Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it._

_See that line. Well I never should have crossed it._

_Stop right there. Well I never should have said_

_That it's the very moment that_

_I wish I could take back._

Deidara decided not to struggle with the plant man anymore. "Wait, Zetsu. I must do something first." The blonde said, then picked up Sasori, only to set him down again. He seemed to be looking for something. He saw a clearing, with a huge cherry blossom tree in the middle. He picked Sasori back up and took some clay out of his pouch.

_I'm sorry for the person I became._

_I'm sorry it took so long for me to change._

_I'm ready to try and never become that way again_

_'Cause who I am hates who I've been._

_Who I am hates who I've been._

Deidara made the small bird explode, which made a perfectly big enough hole for Sasori to fit in. He lowered the redhead into the hole softly, and then started to fill it back up.

_Who I am hates who I've been_

_And who I am won't take the second chance you gave me._

_Who I am hates who I've been_

_'Cause who I've been only ever made me…_

_So sorry for the person I became_

_So sorry that it took so long for me to change._

_I'm ready to try and never become that way again_

_'Cause who I am hates who I've been_

_Who I am hates who I've been_

Deidara found a big, flat rock to mark the place where Sasori had been buried. He said some words for Sasori, and then turned to walk away. But before that, three words escaped his lips,

"_I love you."_


End file.
